Friday, May 7, 2010
This is not about whether “Breast is Best” (which I think goes right up there with the Bisquick slogan “Something good is coming up…” which brings to mind vomit to me!). I understand that this can be an emotional subject. I am not trying to say that those who don’t breastfeed are in anyway less or worse moms because of it. What I want to say is that it is not ok to make moms who do breastfeed cover-up or feed their kids on the toilet! Most assuredly no one should have their home EGGED or their LIFE THREATENED for feeding their baby in public!
One of the comments on the news 8 site states that breastfeeding is “gross”, that “everyone around has to see this going on” “the whole breastfeeding thing is horrible”! This same “man” compares breastfeed to him being able to play with his wife’s breast in public! He ask the question “How do you know it (meaning breast) wasn’t meant to be fondled,”! Well, for me it is because NOW WHERE in the BIBLE does it state anything about men fondling their wives’ breasts, but it is FULL of women giving their CHILDREN SUCK!
Another comment says that this mom most have been making a show of nursing. That the author has nursed in that same mall, in the same area many times. Maybe this mom did make a show of it, I don’t know, but that does not give others the right to threaten or harm her in any way!
This one makes me laugh! “I don't see why she deserves any more respect than the rest of us parents. Most parents are hard working and should be respected as well not just this mother who felt that she needed to make a statement about breast feeding. If she wants respect, she needs to act like she wants respect and not make comments about it not being her problem if her breast feeding offends people. It is her problem if it offends people. I don't find breast feeding offensive, I wanted to breast feed but was unable to, but I do know that had I been able to, I would have respected others and not fed my child in such a public place. Breast feeding is supposed to be a time to bond with your child...how can you bond with them in a noisy, dirty atmosphere such as the play area in a mall?”
First, by saying “I don't find breast feeding offensive,” after having said, “…she needs to act like she wants respect and not make comments about it not being her problem if her breast feeding offends people. It is her problem if it offends people.” Is a total oxymoron! Also, NO IT IS NOT her fault that others take offense! We cannot control what other find offensive! It HAS become her PROBLEM because of how some people are acting out!
It is sad to me that something so natural (although hard at times) has become something that is viewed as sexual! A baby feeding is NOT like a man playing with his wife’s breast!!!!! Our world has made breasts into toys! They are tools for giving your baby nutrition! In a world where women can go around wearing string bikinis & see thru tops, shorts & skirts that show off their bums a mom cannot show a little breast as her little one latches on & receives the nutrition they need!? In a world where movies & TV, show almost (or fully) topless women! I’m sorry but I bet that a lot of the people that complain also allow their children to watch Dukes of Hazard (Daisy’s clothes are not modest), or Fast & Furious (where it is ok to pinch women’s nipples), or any of the CSI franchise! Please, teach your children the difference between these displays of breasts as “sex toys” & the use of breasts as nutrition for a little baby!
Feeding your child is NOT showing lack of respect of yourself or others!! I will admit that I cover up. I personally am not comfortable without a cover in public, so I put up with my kids trying to get the cover off. However, as seen in the video by my friend sometimes kids just won’t let you cover up! It is not a lack of respect for ourselves or for those of you who don’t nurse! It is simply giving our child what they need! I get uncomfortable around some nursing mothers because of how they insist on covering up even when we are in a breastfeeding room! I feel like they are saying it is in modest to nurse! I don’t care if other moms see me nursing my baby! Our breasts are really not that different! How about showing breastfeeding moms some respect & not judging them as perverts!? Understanding that it is a normal, natural thing to do!
Breastfeeding is healthy! Maybe you are unable to do it, but does that mean that no one should have that right!? Please do not think that all breastfeeding moms are out to make formula moms feel bad or less. We ask the same of you, please do not make those of us that nurse feel like we are sick, perverted, Nazis our to conquer the world! We are all moms just doing what we think is best for our babies! If we could learn to work together then we won’t have stories like this one or the millions of others that don’t get on the news!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
I have friends who seem to always be happy being a mom. Their kids do little things, but it never seems to upset them. I think because some struggled with infertility (or other health issues) they now are so happy to be a mom (or even alive) that they don't let the little things bug them. Some have kids that never seem to do any of the insane things my kids do! Others are having to raise their kids along do to death of their wonderful husbands. Sometimes I think I would like to trade places with the moms in the middle group! To have kids that were not as “crazy” as mine are! However, I know that their “craziness” is just because they are exploring their world & they are not afraid to try new things! (even if this gets mom to explode sometimes!) I’m working on remembering this when they do these things!
I was not raised in a home where mom cooked & cleaned everyday. I was the youngest of 4, the closet to me in age was my sister who is 4 1/2 years older. At one point my mother had 3 kids ages 4 & under. I have 4 ages 1 to almost 6 years. Live 500 miles from my closest family. I cannot recall the last time I had some me time to read my scriptures & truly study them! I tried using the time I spend sitting in the van waiting to put my oldest up from school, but the other 3 kids fuss every time I try! I have been able to read the Ensign magazine from my church. I use to study the scriptures a couple of days a week in a class. I LOVED it & I MISS it!
Being a mom is not easy! (just in case you were wondering!)
One of my friends wrote a post on her blog a couple of days ago about being ourselves in our blogs. Sadly, that is what you get here! I'm struggling, but I do so love my kids! It is just hard to go from being single & spending time with your friends whenever you want to having kids & never getting out!
OK, so NEVER is not true, but you do start to feel that way! I get out to go grocery shopping, go to church & church events, & when I or 1 of my friends (that is 1 of my friends, not one of a group of friends) throws a baby shower for our other friends. The closest we have had to a date night in the last couple of months is attending Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University once a week (this is the last week).
In my friends blog she also mentioned that she likes to read blogs where moms are positive about being mom! I think that is because that is how she is. I like reading her blog, but I really enjoy the ones where I can see that the moms have kids as crazy as mine, & Mom is still able to keep her head (most of the time)! I have a couple of friends that have 6-7 kids, I LOVE their blogs! They help me to see that it is ok to get a little irked at your kids doing crazy things, but in the end the BEST thing to do is LAUGH! I forget to laugh sometimes! I let the crazy mess after mess & mommy is not allowed to have anything without sharing (even though she gave us the exact same thing!)! The laundry not getting folded, the dishes not getting put away so the next load can be washed, not having dinner ready. If you’re a mom you know what I’m talking about! Life gets crazy & it is so easy to forget what REALLY MATTERS! These beautiful Spirit Children of God that he has entrusted to you to lead & guide in this life! The crazy things they say! The adorable looks they get on their faces! The way they dance whenever they hear music! The way they know to comfort you when you have reach a breaking point! Having them attack you when you come home from the store, because they missed you! Getting cake smeared all over you on their 1st b-day! Looking at the sweet beautiful sleeping faces & knowing that someday “Your gonna miss this!”So my goal is to try a little harder to enjoy these moments for as one of my favorite quotes says, “In all of living have much fun & laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured!” (Gordon B. Hinckley) I have no doubt he would approve of this use of the quote!